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After the sex, he talked a whole bunch about how much he missed his ex and how great she was. Back when I was young and very horny, I liked big guys. Big as in very tall and very bulky strong. I knew a really shy one, a logger, who was incredibly cute and almost tongue-tied around me. I was patient and finally was able to seduce him. He got me all riled up and moaning, and I begged him to just stick it in. He finished or I hope he did , pulled out, and left. I did see him as he zipped up, he had the equipment of a small boy. I felt so badly for him, but he avoided me after that. I was so dumbfounded.
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As promised, the Smallest Penis in Brooklyn pageant made its return to the borough this weekend, with five new penises and the bodies attached to them vying for the coveted title. For a few stifling hours, Bushwick's Kings County Bar transformed into one giant bachelorette party—assuming that party was held on the 4 train during rush hour, because that's how mobbed this bar was, with everyone and their mother there were a few mothers there anxious to see all the teeny peen. The madness kicked off around 2 p. The bar was bedecked with penis-related balloons, streamers and decor. Bartenders were serving up a special "Penis Colada" drink: a creamy, white concoction that by no coincidence looked like semen, and came with a penis-shaped straw to boot. Uproarious drag queen Chicken Bitches, donning a fur coat and ferocious blonde wig, was back to reprise her role as Master of Ceremonies, introducing the contestants. A block long line for smallest penis contest. Now for the micro penises. There were five contestants this year: the Puzzle Master, Rufio, Rajkumar, Twig 'n Berries and Spiderman mask-wearing Peter Parker, who was a contestant last year, albeit under a different name. Rip Van Dinkle, who was a star sensation at last year's competition, was unable to make it this year thanks to travel woes, according to his Facebook.

Over tiny penis lovers packed into King's County Bar in Bushwick yesterday afternoon for the third annual Smallest Penis In Brooklyn pageant, a celebration of, well, the title says it all. There were considerably more women than men in the crowd for the three hour event, with many small groups of women batched together photographer Melanie Rieders described it as "a bachelorette girls day vibe". MC Chicken Bitches welcomed people by reminding them that this event was a celebration of all sizes but mostly teeny tiny sizes : "If you came here to make fun, you better get the fuck out," she said, adding that the bar hosts the event to "celebrate what you've got," even if what you've got could generously be described as "flyspeck. There's a line around the block to get in and shits about to get REAL pic. Thankfully, the crowd was there to appreciate, not mock, the contestants that included the band Afterbirth Monkey, a music-comedy duo who performed a song about tiny dicks, and also flashed the crowd for good measure. This year there were five brave men who stepped up to the plate: an older gentleman named "Rip Van Dinkle" who perviously competed in the event two years ago , "Chino Loco," "The Gentleman," "Cromwell," and the winner, "Puzzlemaster. Puzzlemaster competed in last year's competition though he lost , memorably reenacting Buffalo Bill's "Would You Fuck Me? I'd Fuck Me" scene from Silence of the Lambs before dropping trou and treating the crowd to a view of his tucked-away junk. Do you know the scoop? Comment below or Send us a Tip.

After the sex, he talked a whole bunch about how much he missed his ex and how great she was. Back when I was young and very horny, I liked big guys. Big as in very tall and very bulky strong. I knew a really shy one, a logger, who was incredibly cute and almost tongue-tied around me. I was patient and finally was able to seduce him. He got me all riled up and moaning, and I begged him to just stick it in. He finished or I hope he did , pulled out, and left.

I did see him as he zipped up, he had the equipment of a small boy. I felt so badly for him, but he avoided me after that. I was so dumbfounded. I tried to act normal but it was the strangest sexual experience of my life. Sorry people, but size DOES matter. I felt like I was screwing a year-old. I have had worse sexual experiences with much larger penises. When he stood up his penis inverted itself like a turtle going into his shell. Needless to say, the relationship did not last much longer than he did.

Barely there. The main issue was with protection, as regular sized condoms tended to slip off — but I got on the pill soon enough, and the sex has been great since. I really liked him and started to wonder why he never invited me to his place or tried to go home with me at the end of the night. Finally, I was about to leave the country and it was our last night hanging out. We were both pretty drunk and I got his pants off and saw that his dick was slightly shorter than a Chapstick tube and thinner than my pinky finger. This was a year-old man essentially in tears telling me this always happens, I felt so bad.

The next morning, we got breakfast like nothing happened and went to art museums all day before I had to leave in the evening to catch a plane, it was an awesome day. He was sweet and I wish I could have stayed and helped him become more comfortable with himself. Size of my middle finger, maybe smaller. To make things worse, it was positioned weird in my mouth and he came without warning, so somehow, jizz came out of my nose.

We were together almost a year. His personality turned me on and we had a lot of fun in and out of bed. Many…have pointed out and given links to support that having one testicle does not affect height or penis size. He had told me that his parents took him to see doctors because of his lack of development. It was awful for him to have to show his penis to doctors and nurses and have his parents discussing the size and how it was small.

I must have decided it was the missing testicle that caused his situation. I stand corrected. But I digress. A young man asked me for a dance. He paid in advance, and I had him sit in a small, private booth. Despite this having happened many times, the sight of his penis caused me to do a bit of a regrettable double-take. Fully erect, it was similar in both length and girth to the upper 2 sections of my pinky finger, i. It was uniform in color, slightly vascular, and all-in-all a good-looking cock despite the startlingly small size.

I could see from his terrified facial expression that he regretted his decision to pull it out. His face turned bright red, and had shame and embarrassment written all over it. For the 1st and only time in my career as a stripper, I let a customer keep his cock unleashed and even jerk himself off while I danced for him. After he finished, he thanked me so profusely that he actually started crying. Later, after he had had a chance to wash his hands and clean himself up a bit, he approached me in the bar. I was feeling a little funny about having allowed a man to jerk off in front of me, but what happened next changed that.

He gave me a huge hug, and thanked me again. This experience made me realize that the intense societal pressure to look good is not limited to women. Clearly, this man had withstood a tremendous amount of emotional damage related to his small dick. What I do know is that his pain was real, that the size of his penis was by no means either his fault or something he could control, and that this type of societal pressure as it relates to men is often overlooked.

One day a doctor told me to put a Foley catheter in a patient. He was overweight which is not rare at all. This guy was not horrible obese either and I could see his balls, just not his penis. Eventually I asked him what he does when he has to go pee, he told me he just sits and goes.

Mother Fucking Magnums. Ugh, we did have sex, unfortunately, and it was horrible. I felt nothing which is so sad! It was a dude I met on Craigslist when I was hard up for cash. He wanted me to make fun of his dick while he jerked off and covered himself with various foods. It was a fucking sweet gig, a couple hundred bucks upfront for an hour of just sitting fully clothed making fun of a guy with a hilariously small dick. Poor dude. Only the second penis I had had, and my first boyfriend was very well-endowed.

This guy was about three inches long, 1 inch wide. It was made even more memorable since we were in his tricked out pick-up truck clearly compensating for something.

I then told everyone about his baby dick, and he amended his story to say we never had sex, that I never saw his penis and had no idea what I was talking about. I was over his apartment hanging out, we were drunk, he started to get frisky, I was not into it even before I saw the member, but…. It was a literal micropenis, not a hyperbolic micropenis—it had to have been about an inch-long nub fully erect.

I honestly just felt kind of guilty looking at it. My memory is a little fuzzy, but I think he mentioned having a small penis, and I distinctly remember pretending to pass out on his couch and pretended to be asleep for the rest of the night.

I want to forget. But it was really wide. Like too wide. He just kinda jiggled it around up in there for a while until he finished. After, I swear his penis disappeared. It was the most awkward sex ever and I avoided him from there on out. I offered anal in hopes of a cheap thrill, he accepted, but wanted to do it laying on our sides. He basically dry humped my butt cheeks for a minute and then had the most awkward, high pitched orgasm ever, by a human.

It went terribly. Maybe not necessarily because of the size, but it was just a bad experience in general. Then when we had sex it was awful. I was sad. When I broke up with him, he used it on me against my will. Being raped with a micropenis is weird. He got the dick he deserves as a person. Like, maybe an inch and a half.

I still stayed with him for about 3 months. I was attracted to his personality. I broke up with him because he was a douche, but the sex would probably be a MUCH bigger problem today if I met him as my current self.

He did not seem interested in pursuing such things. Therein lied the majority of the problem. It was oddly thin, and flat, like a thumb.

Worse, it was tapered toward the end. When I first saw it, I thought that it was flaccid. I was wrong, and I never felt a thing. He insisted that he needed the XL ones. For his thumb penis. If you are starting to feel sympathy, stop. He was a very insecure year-old, and would take it out on me physically.

He deserves what he has. Like…I guess



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